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About Me

Hi,

I'm Payton, a 41 year old geek from east central Scotland. I program computers in Python for a living, and I'm interested in fashion, technology, videogames, cinema, and art. I also enjoy walking, swimming, photography, cookery, and sewing. I'm learning silversmithing at the moment, although I can't guarantee that I will still be doing so in a year's time.

I mostly plan on using this site for journalling and shitposting. There might be the occasional selfie or photograph of something creative.

Finding it interesting comparing my new X-E1 with my older camera (a Nikon J1, a 1-inch sensor system camera).

The additional size definitely means that I can't be as adventurous with it. On the other hand, it seems to have a ferocity that the J1 lacked. It's almost like trying an industrial sewing machine after being used to home machines.

The first time I realized how far I could push it in terms of shot frequency was quite eye opening.

Today's look. ABH Alyssa Edwards palette, Urban Decay Bittersweet lipstick, Illamasqua Sophie blush, and Fenty Rosé on Ice Fairy Bomb highlighter. Dress is a linen/viscose wrap dress from Next.

Got myself a new camera to replace my Nikon J1, which is not behaving itself anymore. The replacement is a Fujifilm X-E4, which has a much larger sensor, and considerably more processing power onboard. It is also a fair bit larger, so I am hoping that this won't be the end of my previous snap-happy relationship with my system camera.

Have been thinking about taking some drawing classes in the autumn. There's a few options I fancied. Look and Draw are doing a life drawing course and an introduction to colour. I think it'll be useful for me to do these, and they will build on the last drawing class I took a few years back. The location is also very convenient for me.

Started on enameling this week. I didn't really get much done, but we covered the basics of the technique. The copper ring I've been working on is also nearing completion. Once that's done, I'm going to park ringmaking and stone setting for a while.

I think that I did something right here.

Illamasqua lipstick, and back on the YSL Touche Éclat. Also, back to MAC Modern Mandarin blush. Also got a Charlotte Tilbury copper eyeliner going on.

Gonna drop off my Trickers and my old G-Star boots at the cobblers tomorrow for an overhaul. New soles all round.

Food, non-vegan 

Pleased with the way the broccoli and stilton soup turned out. Thinking that the caraway seeds made a big difference. Used a lot of mirepoix. More of that than of the broccoli. And half a head of savoy cabbage that was hiding in the fridge. There may also have been a good splash of sherry too.

I'm calling this ring finished now. Spent some more time polishing it tonight, and set the amethyst cabochon.

My Mum's away home now. Spent yesterday chilling in the park with some friends off of Twitter.

Beltane last night. It rained, but it was a lot of fun. My third time there, and my Mum's first.

Took my Mum to the Portrait Gallery today for lunch and to see the Scottish ethnographic photographs celebrating the census. In the afternoon, we took the guided tour of the Georgian House on Charlotte Square.

Another new pair of earrings by the amazing Sheena in Perth (shinygleamy on Insta)

Feeling so knackered today. Tomorrow is a day off, and I'm looking forward to a lie in.

Payton boosted

I definitely get a better night's sleep if I put my blindfold on. It's funny, because I remember wanting one as a child when I saw people using them for sleep in American films.

Food 

Made mushroom risotto for my Mum tonight. Haven't made that in a while, but it still worked out well.

I'm also amazed that a 34-year-old battery backed SRAM can still hold save data.

Was reminded that there is a reason why I actually test my games before I sell them. One of the Mega Drive cartridges I photographed last weekend just refused to boot.

Gender dysphoria, weight 

About a year ago (one year on cross-sex hormones), I found I was a lot more comfortable with the face I saw looking back at me in the mirror. I was starting to see myself, rather than someone else.

Slowly, I started to feel better about my body. As the curves started to appear, and I started to acquire a defined waist, I no longer felt disgusted with the way I looked despite being heavier than I had been in years.

At the two year mark, I am actually really starting to love my body. It's no longer a matter of incongruity in my mind. I see a feminine shape from the front, and from the side. I see me, and seeing myself brings me joy.

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