"where do you see yourself in ten years?" 

the interviewer asks. i think for a moment, then chuckle. it grows into a guffaw, then becomes quiet. a stillness sits between us; i struggle to say anything until i decide to say only, "alive somewhere, i hope."

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"what is your greatest strength?" 

the interviewer asks. i came prepared for this one, and say quickly, "converting glucose into energy. my microbial ancestors worked hard to imbue me with this power, and i am proud to carry on the tradition."

"what is your greatest weakness?" 

the interviewer asks. this one is actually kind of embarrassing, but i decide to be honest. i say hesitantly, "i can't convert sunlight into energy," as i glance jealously at the potted plant near the door. i cover my eyes and struggle not to cry.

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"what is your greatest weakness?" 

@uint8_t incidentally the same answer that Air Bud gave in the interview.

"what is your greatest weakness?" 

@garbados
too relatable

"what is your greatest strength?" 

@garbados @ashfurrow HIRE THIS PERSON

"what is your greatest strength?" 

@garbados Nice!

I usually go with "converting oxygen into carbon dioxide," but you've blown me out of the water there. Well done.

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Toot.Cat

On the internet, everyone knows you're a cat — and that's totally okay.