devil went down to SF, looking for a soul to steal. he was in a bind because he was way behind, so he was willing to make a deal;
when he came across this young man selling a bad idea and hawking it hot. and the devil jumps up with a rambling TED talk and says, "boy lemme tell you what"
"guess you didn't know it but i'm a big investor too; if you care to take a dare i will make a bet with you. you pitch a pretty evil startup son but give the devil his due. i bet a billion dollars against your stock i think i'm worse than you."
boy said, "my name's trevor and it might make me rich, so i'll take your bet and you're gonna regret i'm the worst that's ever been"
I bet you didn't know it, but I'm a gourmand juicer, too, and if you'd care to get a share, I'll make a bet with you. Now you make a pretty tasty juice, boy, but give the Devil his due. I'll bet a squeezer of gold against your soul cause I think packets are better than you.
The boy said my name's Johnny and while I'm no VC, I can smell your tech and you're gonna regret cause no one wants a juice machine.
On the internet, everyone knows you're a cat — and that's totally okay.